I don’t know I don’t know, this is what you say when you shake your head and tell me that it’s a counterfeit note. fuck I mean I mean there are so many people here why do you always pick on me? I went to the other place the other day and they told me it was no problem so why are you telling me I don’t know I don’t know and shake your head and tell me that it’s a counterfeit note?
a cop drops by and sits down next to him.
oh great now they call you here because I’m talking too much right too loud? okay okay stop. I’ll read the newspaper. I mean I went to the other place and I broke a note in two and there was no problem. but you keep shaking your head and tell me nonono.
a madman loops the hoops around his head wraps it in cellophane and thinks thinks thinks something stinks around here but it’s only his own bo making a scene in the crowded park where the birds are taking a shower under the big bright sunny sky so why don’t you just leave him alone and let it be but you can’t resist and think about it and wonder why. it’s just the loops of hoops wrapped around his head, so much noise once upon a time he was just like you and me but he found an answer to his problems somehow and this is where he lives now inside the house where there are rocks in his head the sun is so bright fake gold snatches of poetry read at the bus-stop I hope it doesn’t rain later because it’s so sunny and bright now people walking everywhere so many cars and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and
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okay soit’s like this. I start with a line and go where it wants to go like francis bacon I read from this book about him. but sometimes it’s hard when everything is pushing crowding jostling into my head and the pen stutters I mean it’s a good thin g but somnethhing in me doesn’t like it somehow oir the other and I keep trying to try and I try again until something forms I look around people sitting there all around me I wonder what theyre thinking whether they notice me and then one way or another it moves and maybe finally I’ll get int ot the rhythm and something nice forms on the page I try to let it flow but sometimes I ask for too much and it becomes a problem.
I lit and cigarette and I try to enjoy it but the air is not right and the heat is making it taste like plaster and I wonder whether a cold is on its way. I keep an eye out for hot chicks with hot bodies walking by a pair of nice tits or a nice ass, something sexy maybe a glimpse of cleavage doesn’t really matter I go back to what I was doing and let it flow flow flow
I made a mess again masturbating late into the night. chunks of it all over my belly and pubic hair fishy smell waiting to become. imagine where I would be if I weren’t here. maybe stuck in somewhere cold dark and smelly somewhere. you be a bum. next to a rubbish heap and we can imagine all sorts of asian delicacies in all the plastic bags inside the bins. be like a dog. we are all the same. animals.
shake shakeshake so I told him no this is not how you do it. so many eyes looking at us. look back at them so what. I want to punch and kick and kill. so many motherfuckers around. I know some of you prefer to turn the blade against yourself. yeah like how this one time when this fuck came up to us and threatened to slash his own wrist if we didn’t givbe him some money. I mean fuck go on do it it’s your knife and wrist. but leave us the fuck out of it. okay?
I get so sick sometimes. so many things. what I cannot say. what they can say. what I can say what they cannot say. shut up better. now you’re talking. like a cat hiding behind a mirror with its tail wiggling thinking you can’t see him. we are so often like that. who you trying to fool? the signs are everywhere. you just have to know how to read them. the food is not bad but the service sucks. but I left a tip I don’t know why.
so many voices telling you to do so many things in your head. go to bed. make the bed. show that you care. call him and find out if. call him and let him know that. fucking Hitler to-do list ordering you to walk fuck sleep go here and there like a fuckin toy soldier. bitch! I just want to do nothing. just waste all the fucking time pouring into the fucking drain of existence so fucking philo so sophical now. kani na! chee bye! cursing in multi-language linguistics in genitalia. everybody knows fuck because fuck is what we are made of and made from. tiuuuuuu!!!!!!!!!!!!1 a cry of desperation from inside the box outside another box box you in the fucking head and die.at the bookstore flipping through the books talking bla blah blah every fucking book has something to say hahahah that’s so true it’s not even funny. tell a story wow get into the intriguing plot and drown your imagination. conjure. too many people okay. one too many.
okay I stop. one more only. hate myself love myself. you too with your package baggage. different content but same deal. maybe guns or gins inside. x-ray monsters waiting. thinking. shhh. why do you tell me to shut up? people play music for different reasons I can’t see the bloody difference. bloody is an English affectation no? colonial masters come back and save the day but I know you can’t even save yourself because you’re post now. post, like toast. too much on your plate yourself. so what about us monkeys with brains? sushi eaten like your own brain. did you know that in Cantonese bosses are referred to as brain small? low sigh. ask chinkee wong he will tell you but make sure he speaks Cantonese like a Chinese. okay? good night or good morning. I go fun cow now. bye-bye.
and on that high note....
do not erase this or i will kill you. gona have to come back to it.
fun cow out the door, trying to push its way out of dreams and into the cracks between the stairs of her thighs
flowness in the eyes of god. in one piece it breaks apart and away like crumbling sauce of the highest order. tall drink beer head. creamy like a saxophone. kenny with his maggi mee hair.
a desire to test those writers. why? who the fuck do you think you are with your sartorial suit and stern spectacles? maybe a cane too behind your back?
it gets sickening too when everyone’s acting so nice and dandy when you know for sure how they’re fuckin rolling their eyes under their breath muttering shit in your face. so come on motherfucker let’s duke it out to liven things up around here.
after a few minutes of draining, the rain decide to ease the pain. street signs melting under the sun into puddles of mud. teeth against metal, daily grind till your teeth become lethal like a vampire’s. blood too she and I talking in the coffeeshop waiting for the rain to finish dripping. I want to fuck her and do all the things I’ve seen in porno with her but only in my mind. I mean, if she not told me, but take off all her clothes and lay down on the marbled table and spread long legs wide for me to enter I would definitely run helter skelter into the here comes the sun.
now is twenty faust century. we fuck in our minds what we cannot fuck in real life. in fact this is realer than wife. this applies too, not only in role-play(stupid) but complete overhaul of renewal sex role visa. she a sister now, a daughter now, lolita now, whore now, someone’s woman now, opp, come get some. but only in the mind, where the land mines set off by themselves, by invisible feet twelve times the maximum effect goes boomboomboom.
the narratives slipping sliding winding grinding into her ears shaking things up, hahahah, there lies the secret lies. for if I told you that I’m lying am I still lying down? lay down your arms and read some hemingway blew his brains out in a jiffy oh papa. buy more books read more fuck off. I see giant swordfish stuck up some old man’s ass. putrid. lurid. astrid. eyes clamping down shutdown meltdown. quim. anthony quim so much tv growing up. my brain like fried eggs full of bran flakes. bill never had it so good. madonna said you put this in me, now what? hairy I said. shaggy like methuselah hahahah.
well joe, I said. so much pussy swimming in the goddamned whirlpool swimming poo. I see loser screaming for creaming. fucking in the wee hours of the morning. you want to get caught cut off your dick if they catch you. not police but the veedee. or the ass tee dee. no, it’s not the system direct dial in malay. it’s your rotting cock falling off at the latrine and into the latrine. flushed down for all the alligators in the land. all eat gate errs. ali gaters. bin mustafa hassan.
who’s that chinkoid dong lusting after all the pretty girls with his sweat moustache and cunny face? he’s your brother, cream of sum new maths. brilliant mind, but at night when it’s quiet a big cock and two big balls sit there waiting to be bogged down by horny. like the ant who wandered into a hole and got spat at by the giant readheaded cocksnake. funny joke that was, when our clothes were hanging in the closet waiting to be dried. shoeboxes full of porno diamonds and jewels. pick one or two and throw them into the hole in your face. hard like rock candy, sugar for the soul in your pants. when you burped i heard angels singing. hallelujah and some xtian shit like that. go to church every sunday and worship the big daddy like all the white men do. go on, it’s your thing. all those pussies saying their prayers. you like! hose them down with your holy jizm water. no devil would touch them except you, you with your pot of belly roast pork sizzling on the hot plate in a hot place.
johhnny lee was another fucking joker. never liked cycling around the neighbourhood. father is rich, mother a witch. alarms at every window, protecting his monkey face and his cunty sisters. what thiefs want to steal from him I do not want. chongking chong. ching too if not chingchongchung. cocksucker must’ve been on the privileged karma bullshit list. but short and simian is what he got along with the thumb and index finger rubbing together. wonder where he is now? prolly doing some austrolopolynesian boo boo ballooha. means doctor in pithecus language of doom.
so I sat him down one day and yanked the shit out of him. doctor proctor, proctologist extraordinaire. what’s with this anal bullshit anyway I asked him. he just giggled and laughed his savings away. piggy bank intact, but the pinkness of the glare suckling piglets is soon to be.
says “alamak!” and slaps himself on the forehead. should have done the crispy tongue jig with ah bong king long ago!
you read king kong but I had meant singsong longdong.
jong and the fong, trying to play mahjong, going clack clack clack with the whack whack whack.
I smell cigarette smoke in the swimming pool. what’s that piece of turd doing in his turban? stick it back up where it belongs!
one more jerkoff and we’re good to go.
okay let’s go.
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